Honoring My Mother: A Tribute

I would like to highlight, once again, the salient features of my Mom, how she handled being a mother to her 9 children, without going through the basics of Motherhood 101! I recall posting the same subject matter 3 years ago (under “Family” blog category), a year after she passed away and it was difficult for me at that time putting in writing every description of her entire life as a mother..

Even if she’s no longer visibly around, she remains to be a guide, protector and a friend. There were times that she appeared to me in my dreams together with my Dad, who left us years ahead of her, making me feel that they are still looking after their children, appreciating of our accomplishments and comforting us in our trials and tribulations. It was only when I wake up, I realized it was merely a segment of a dream,. I tend to be emotional about, sometimes gets teary-eyed and couldn’t avoid sobbing alone, once in a while.

As mentioned in my previous blog, our mother was a full-time homemaker, rearing her 9 children and humbly attending to their needs. She was a major influence to us, in our decision makings and our dealings with other people.

Below are some astonishing facts which she would not have known otherwise, and I thought this is the best way to honor her during Mother’s day. I have shared this with you before, I hope you don’t mind me re-posting this once more.

1. Our mother was selfless, very kind-hearted generous woman yet tough and strict.

I remember when we’re still kids, my mother would have to gather us to pray the Angelus every 6 pm each day and wouldn’t start the prayer if one is missing in the group. If someone is not around and is still playing outside with friends, she would go out of the door and had this amazing way of calling us. It sounded like a twit of a bird or a whistling sound which we knew that it was her, that it was time for us to be home. I’m not sure if my siblings would still remember these things. It’s sort of a bit funny or could be the sweetest sound but it was also of a concern because I knew there could be an accompanying responsibility and at times a price we had to pay for not being at home on time! And believe me when we pray, we couldn’t just sit anywhere and participate in the praying, we had to be with the group and kneel down just what she did. Otherwise, we would get a word of caution or warning from her!

As a very kind-hearted woman, she was so accommodating to anyone, especially the lowly and oppressed, knocking on our door begging for food and clothes. She would invite them inside, fed them and gave them out slightly used old clothes, sometimes with an extra small sum of money, making people leave our house with happy faces. She couldn’t bear the sight and the thought that poor people leave her house in sorrow. I remember another instance where we would welcome some people in our home on an honor-system basis, to the extent of allowing them to stay with us for years and treat them just like a member of a family. In fact, these people were sent to school and in exchange, they would do certain household chores, just like what we did at home – running household and/or personal errands.

2. Our mother was a self-reliant, independent and a hands-on person.

She was very hard working woman, an all around, do-it yourself person- a very good cook wherein some of my favorites include the very tasteful home made cakes (torta) baked in an old style fire furnace, sweet and salted rice cakes (suman), cassava cakes, fish “escabeche” (originally a Spanish recipe), beef stew with tomato sauce and other ingredients, tapas, her own “adobo” recipe, green seaweed/sweet potato leaf salad added with vinegar and onions, steamed tarot and yams and so many more. She was our chef and we would be her assistants, preparing the ingredients but we’re more interested on the taste test side of it!

She was our hairstylist and continued to be when ever we’re home. In fact, she was the one who first cut our hairs and did our first curls. There were times that we would try to beat each other and fall in line for the hair cut during weekends. Trust me, she was very good at it, and she could truly style the hair the way we wanted it to be. Probably she was forced to learn it by herself because almost of her children are girls except for one boy. And oh yes, even our only brother got his first taste of a haircut from her!

3. Our mother was a businesswoman in her own right.

I recall when my older siblings had to go to college. She established a small variety store so as to augment the family’s earnings. I also learned and acquired from her my business acumen, the wholesale/retail consignment method and the pricing strategies. She may not be an MBA degree holder but it was great that my first informal business know-how emanated from her. She was intelligent and I’ve discovered that she was among the top of their class during her school days.

I have also first learned from her about the barter system. She may not be aware of the technical parlance, but yes she knew how to trade our things in exchange for commodities. An instance is when poor farmers would go to the city center to trade their crops in exchange for clothes, blankets and other things they needed in their respective homes, my mother would engage in said activities. In fact, even without the traded goods, she would end up giving the needed things to these poor men and women.

I mentioned in my previous blog that my mother knew how to fashion dresses for her young children, especially when she had her first sewing machine. If she finds time, instead of buying ready made clothes, she would do the measurements, sketched the dress and made a pattern on a piece of large paper before sewing it. She didn’t go to a formal fashion school, it was more of a self-taught learning skill. She did not only sew some of our dresses but also for some small projects like curtains, for small windows and pillow cases, for home use.

4. Our mother was a very patient, relentless and pious woman.

Ever since I was a child, I observed my mother would wake up in the wee hours (3 or 4 am) of the morning, kneel beside her bed and pray the Holy Rosary and other devotional prayers. This habit of hers continued up to her heydays. During her mid younger days , I would hear her murmurs, silently saying her intentions pleading to God for mercy and forgiveness. Except when she’s indisposed, she would hear mass every day and brought us bread or any food which she bought on her way home. To her, the day would not be complete without attending the Holy Mass and receiving the Holy Communion.

Married to a man who was fond of being with friends, during younger days, with peers who were like a family to him, having social drinking with them, and sometimes getting “groggy” at the end of the day, was an agony to my mother. Lifting up everything to God, served as an outlet to her worries, and oh yes, her prayers were granted – it worked after so many years! Our father’s social drinking habit has diminished and they both had a very good time together thereafter.

She was so patient and persevering, especially in dealing with my father’s whims like food to prepare, office clothes to wear and so on and so forth. She would gladly do these things sans complaints even though she was already exhausted just so to avoid further argument. My Mom and Dad were exactly the opposite!

My mother was my first teacher and catechist. I first learned from her about God and everything about spiritual beliefs. She first taught us the basic prayers and the Angelus and later the Holy Rosary with the Litany. Even without deliberate memorization of the said prayers but because of the constant praying of the Holy Rosary, I was able to memorize the mysteries and would you believe the litany as well which up to now I recite it by heart! For us young kids and teens then, we didn’t grasp the full significance of the said prayers – it appeared said things were repetitious and were imposed on us! It was only when we were growing up that we’re able to recognize the beauty and the importance of praying, especially the Holy Rosary. Truth is, I am now applying the lessons learned from my mother in my class telling them how prayers are important in our lives. I almost forgot another very good trait which I’ve learned from our parents – that after praying, we approached them, kissed them and placed their hands on our foreheads for blessings and as a sign of respect. Thereafter, the younger siblings would then go to the older ones and do the same thing.

Our mother was involved in church related organizations. As a matter of fact, she became one of the sponsors or “hermanas” during feast day celebrations. This is the reason why majority of her children are now actively involved in civic and socio-related activities.

She was my first music teacher too. She loved to sing and had a sweet voice. Hmmm, my good voice must have come from her, kidding aside! Oh yes, she had this skill of doing second voice thru the so-called “owido” (playing it by ear) which I realized just now that I have also acquired it from her. And more oh yessessss, she danced gracefully too!

5. Our mother was our first faithful doctor/nurse, mentor, critic, and our best friend ever.

I recall when we were sick during our younger days, our mother was the one who was there awake all night by our side, caring for us, cooking and feeding us our favorite food, giving us the needed medicines to make us well and healthy. She was there to provide moral support whenever it was time for her children to give birth and taught them how to bathe and care their first babies. It was just so frustrating that I wasn’t there by her side when she needed me most. I know from the deepest of her heart, she would understand me, just what she had been – a very considerate person.

She was our critic even during her golden years. Whenever she saw us not in proper attire, if we’re showing a little some of our skins, she would jokingly call our attention to change our dress. And if she liked it, she would just sit there in the corner quietly looking at us with a smile dancing upon her lips. I knew she was keeping her praises for us to herself. She was not really outspoken as far as flattering and pleasing people are concerned. As I said, she was more on the “critiquing” side!

She was our best friend ever. When our Dad first left to join Our Creator, our mother was wandering from one of her children’s place to another. Even in her older years, she tried as much as possible to travel and visit her children and be with them for a month or so. She would initiate the planning of a reunion for all of us and I can still vividly recall how she looked very happy, anxiously waiting for us at the gate whenever it was time for our flight arrivals. She had plans in mind with one of my sisters as her partner. We would go to a beach for a swim, visit tourist places, or just simply stay at home discussing various issues or even ending up in arguments! Oh yes, we’re normal creatures, especially in a female dominated place – we had misunderstandings- the so called siblings rivalry – and she would be the arbiter! But overall, it was a great feast for all of us with the delicious food served on the table just like the parable about the rich father who prepared nice things for his prodigal son to return to his home!

Our mother’s last birthday and final days of her life

On her birthday, we planned for a grand celebration for her. We offered gifts, flowers, and delivered our extemporaneous personal messages which she gladly accepted with a modest smile. We designed a program and had the presentations recorded on video, and oh yes there was even a banner greeting with her photo on it mounted on the wall of the hotel’s ball room. She was very excited about it, as if she was celebrating her 18th birthday. I recall we sang the song “Through the Years” with a twist and had it re-worded so as to suit the occasion. How I wish I could have written this before and delivered a well thought meaningful birthday message during that time. I am sure she would only smirk at it but would be proud of me silently at the same time! Actually, my mother was happy and contented just by seeing her children completed their studies, and have turned into successful adults.

When I last saw her, my mother was still feeling great. When I bade farewell to her, she kissed and hugged me tightly as if she wanted me not to go but I simply ignored it and set aside the emotions brewing at that time. Our communications then were limited and undertaken thru telephone calls and internet conveyed messages. There were always the friendly reminders from her – the love and care of a mother to her child, until the gloomy sad news that she followed and be with Dad and her Creator in Heaven, after a decade. I would have wanted to say my deepest sincere apologies to her for my shortcomings, for my limitations and weaknesses. I would have wanted to say a quadrillion thanks for all the love and sacrifices. I would have wanted to share with her more of my time and tell her how much her child deeply loved her, but she could no longer hear it, feel it! That time was the most difficult, unhappiest and terrible moment of my life, in fact till now. But when I think of my mother when she was alive, it gave me emotional and spiritual healing, because I know she will always be there to offer prayers for her children, to offer birthday masses for her children and to comfort them when in trouble and in despair, no matter what, against all odds!

To my Mom, my heartfelt Happy Mother’s day and to the mothers out there, a wonderful and joyful Mother’s day to you all!

The Power of Multi-Media in Political Campaigns

No one will argue with the assertion that communications staff or public relations (PR) group of any Government throughout the world would definitely utilize multi- media network to publicize Government information and deliver its goods and services to the public. The said multi-media, which involve the mainstream tri-media, social media via the Internet, including blogs and citizen-led campaign network, has undeniably played a crucial role in shaping the political landscape of a particular economy. Multi-media has also been branded as a very effective tool in sending across messages in converging people in the streets, demanding reforms or in worst-case scenario, in changing heads of Governments. It had been proven effective in certain countries as is the case of Egypt and Libya wherein technology and social media such as blogs, facebook, twitter, data gathering via e-mails and other networking sites worked to the advantage of the people who have clamored for change, resulting in removal of Government’s leadership.

In the same manner, the public relations or the communication’s staff of any politician utilizes multi- media in their campaigns to manage the latter’s public image and gauge public support. This is in reality a universal strategy, a norm used by various political groups to achieve a successful political campaign, not only in advanced nations but also in developing and third world countries.

The first U.S. Presidential election wherein President Obama was declared winner, was a classic example of an efficient utilization of multi-media. During the start of the nomination, Obama was nowhere in the picture, not so very famous to the public being a low-key Senator from Chicago. But due to his PR group’s use of an extensive and innovative multi-media specifically social networks and the huge data base of prospective voters, his supporters were successful in packaging him well, emphasizing his wits, abilities and charisma, which made him win at the end of the day.

The Philippines is looking forward for a mid-term election 4 days from now. A certain bulk of the electorates of the said country is technology and internet savvy, hence politicians are relying heavily on multiple media outlets to showcase and promote their individual platforms and agenda. Based on social monitor data culled out from socialbakers.com, the Philippines occupies the No. 8 slot of Facebook users by country. It has now 30.5 million monthly active users. On the other hand, Semiocast shows that Twitter users in the Philippines reached 9.5 million, making it No. 10 in the ranking all over the world.

Since voters in the Philippines are users of networking sites, it simply makes perfect sense for the politicians to reach out to them and appeal for their votes via the said social media venues. This is the reason why the politicians themselves, especially the not-so-young, have learned to use and embrace the internet, at least the rudiments of the said technology. In order to make them known and get their messages out to the public, the communication staff of the candidates would create websites solely for the campaign, others would hop from networking sites to the other, designing pages for voters to like, creating various accounts, interacting with social media users, posting at blogs, devising slogans, forming teams and crafting their respective causes. The said schemes shape voter’s view and perception toward the politicians and this has been proven to be a galvanizing force in the political arena.

Now that its barely days before the election, the politicians with their supporters are holding campaign sorties here and there to get the sympathy of the voters. But apart from campaign rallies, the politicians are also keen employing multi-media at an all time peak in order to gain momentum in the election surveys and to be ahead of the curve. Thus, if a candidate for Senator would be able to capture the facebook and twitter users alone, majority of whom are presumably eligible to cast ballots, it could give him or her the No. 1 Senatorial spot, on effortless basis!

The latest SWS survey reflected 6 new Senatorial candidates who would be able to make it to the Top 12, but are not so well known to voters, particularly in other regions of the country, namely: Nancy Binay, Bam Aquino, Grace Poe, JV Estrada, Cynthia Villar and Sonny Angara. Surely, the said 6 candidates have “name recalls”, being close kins of famous politicians, not to mention the endorsements of various groups for the said candidates, and which could form part of the determining factors for their possible seats in the Upper House. However, the influence and the “efficient” use of multi-media (whether for positive or negative attacks) could be the dynamic and major feature of their campaign. The communications strategy used by the PRs of the said candidates via multi-media has seemingly swayed the voter’s perception and it could favorably worked on their side.

Take for example the slogans used by Binay (“Nanay sa Senado” or “Mother in the Senate”) and Villar’s (“Misis Hanepbuhay” or “Mrs..Livelihood”?) appeared to have been bought by the sample voters as shown in the latest survey. Note that the said 2 candidates neither tap well known personalities to endorse them in tri-media ads nor were present in any scheduled debates, but still enjoying a comfortable advantage over the rest.

There’s no point in asking why or how come (?), we just have to respect the outcome, it only means democracy is working damn well (assuming there would be no cheats). We may have our choices and they could not be included in the top 12 in all of the surveys conducted by Pulse Asia and SWS. But, who knows, the ballots have not been cast yet and the latest survey had a sample of only 2,700 registered voters anyway ( with a national error margin of +/- 2 percentage points). There is still room for our Senatorial bets to rise up, just like the good Senator Jun Magsaysay. We know in our hearts and minds who among of the candidates are worthy of the seat in the “august chamber” and who would be able to serve and lift up majority of the Filipino people, the real, poor and struggling “Juan de la Cruz”.

So guys, go, get out and exercise your right to vote, but please vote the men and women who would be worthy to be addressed “Honorable”!

A Sad Encounter with a Psychopath!

It was a cool and gloomy day in March, just about the beginning of the autumn season in the “land down under”, when “Isabelle” had to cross the “Rubicon” and finally called it quits for her job, which she had learned to love and enjoy for so many years. WHY? That’s the big question mark! Yes, why such an abrupt decision to leave her job voluntarily at these precarious times?

When she confided me about what happened in their workplace for the past several months, that was the only time I understand the rationality of her swift decision to end her career with, and even more so without asking for any entitlements from a large and prestigious banking institution in a developed country like Australia.

At that point in time, giving up her career almost immediately was inevitable. She had to get out of the “dark hole” as soon as she could so as to get some fresh air, so to speak, as she might get choked. Unless she rallied all her strength to get out of the “hole’, she would really suffocate. His “toxic” boss made her remaining days and months in the office miserable.

This happened after months of discussions and meetings with the concerned parties and likewise after patiently waiting for a resolution from the management and other agencies (e.g. labor and human rights groups) which had been requested to mediate on the said problem. Unfortunately, the said negotiations were not to Isabelle’s favor. Obviously, the said human rights and labor firms merely left the matter to the management for resolution, making it a mere internal conflict between the employer and employee. Isabelle got frustrated on this. She couldn’t believe the said action taken by the supposedly “friendly” groups. All along, she thought these groups could help her resolve her problem with management, as part of her last resort quest.

To provide you a brief history on the subject, let’s backtrack a little bit on what happened several months before she gave in to the demands of her “monster-like” office colleague/boss.

Isabelle was enjoying her job in one of the bank’s team offices/departments, even earning awards and the accolade from her previous managers and superiors. As a matter of fact, she was always chosen as the employee with the highest productivity rating of the said department. Unfortunately, the said department’s operation was off-shored to one of the developing countries in Asia, for certain reasons. In view of this, Isabelle’s “good-natured” boss was eventually assigned to Asia to manage the said offshore activities. Isabelle opted not to join her boss, so she was left in the main office and was absorbed by another department. The new head of Isabelle’s present team used to be of her grade level, before he got promoted as the head of the said department. (Note: Isabelle got even a higher productivity rating than her new “boss”, though they were not teammates before).

Since it was a new job assignment and entirely different from the previous one, Isabelle went through a formal training process and fortunately got to know and familiarize her present job easily. At that time, even if her position had a higher salary rate in the new department, she didn’t ask for a raise. She thought it would be prudent to wait for few more months to prove her worth and negotiate later with her new “boss”.

Isabelle’s problem started when their department opened up new and better jobs and all of these were not offered to her. Thus, on her own volition, Isabelle took the opportunity by signifying interest for the said newly opened job openings. However, without any explanation from her boss, she was not even considered at all for any of the said newly opened positions, even if, to Isabelle’s assessment, she was more than qualified than the new entrants who knew nothing about the job “from Adam”! She felt there was clear discrimination in the hiring process and that a “silent harassment” was inflicted on her. She got no immediate, concrete and valid answers from her boss, as a matter of fact, during her one-on-one conversation with him, the latter appeared to have no sympathy with her. He even told her, straight to her face, that her duties and functions are “petty” and even further belittled her performance. To Isabelle, the said comments were fabricated lies, uncalled for, and had no basis at all. She did not expect neither to hear “bad” words nor witness such a “negative” behavior from a supposedly “professional”, like his “boss”. From then on, her boss was always “picking on” her for no reason at all.

Due to the humiliations she suffered, Isabelle was no longer happy with her work. There had been sleepless nights and she could no longer concentrate on her studies at night, being a part-time student. At that point, reporting to office was very stressful on her part. Her health was affected that she even developed hypertension due to depression.

To remedy the situation, Isabelle was still sane enough to report the matter to their Human Resource (HR) Office and raised her grievances on bullying, discrimination and harassment. But just the same, there was no positive outcome. Isabelle felt something strange; it was as if her “boss” seemed to have maneuvered everything against her.

Isabelle attempted to speak again with her boss, however, the matter got worse. Her boss gave a “deaf ear” on her viewpoints and complaints. At this time, Isabelle had the courage to raise the issue about her salary emphasizing that she was the only one receiving a low grade salary compared to her peers in the office. Was it because she was the only South East Asian in the group? It was further expressed to him that the situation is disadvantageous on her part and that her salary is no longer commensurate to her duties and qualifications.

In view of this, she was called to a meeting by one of the bank’s senior officers and her boss, and she thought that was a good chance to narrate her story with the presence of a “third party”. Much to her dismay, both the senior manager and her boss accused her of allegedly breaching the office code of conduct and warned her of a possibility of putting her for disciplinary action. Isabelle couldn’t believe what was happening; the senior manager was siding with his boss, she simply couldn’t fathom the fact!

So, Isabelle being left alone with no “strong fortress” to lean on reported the matter again to HR but the same was not investigated. So, she went to the Human Rights Commission and submitted a formal complaint against her boss. It took a while for the Human Rights group to respond to the issues raised. As mentioned in the earlier part of this blog, the matter was not resolved on their part, instead it was remanded back to bank’s management.

For Isabelle, going back to the office was no longer an alternative. She thought the option to quit was the best solution at that point in time, considering her deteriorating health situation and embattled peer relationship. It was getting nowhere, his boss had been imposing burdensome and unfair demands from her, i.e., to go extra miles out of her way, so to speak. She never thought she would meet such an exceptional unreasonable person in her entire life. Isabelle felt this kind of boss is psychologically sick and perhaps not worthy of her or even anyone’s respect and service. She was sad though leaving the bank, but what was weird she didn’t understand why the senior management allowed inappropriate behavior, a “psychopath” like his boss, to flourish in their workplace.

Even if she is a devout believer in God, Isabelle started to question why God allowed this to happen to her. But because of her strong faith in HIM, Isabelle was able to stand up and amazingly, she felt relief when she finally decided to leave. Isabelle did not pursue anymore the option of filing a case against her boss. Such option would be costly on her part, she would not be able to afford a legal battle with a “giant” in the industry. At present, Isabelle is happy and contented; she diverted her attention to other fields of interests and recently obtained a scholarship cash grant from a reputable school because of her academic excellence achievement.

Isabelle decided to share her story as part of her awareness campaign that there are emerging and thriving bosses and peers out there in workplaces who will bully, harass or discriminate a person in one way or another. These people have no compassion and are indeed pathological liars, getting what they want out of their peers/staff/employees.

You see, a good boss should be someone who is “human”, a human being who recognizes that everyone has weaknesses and that said weaknesses can be changed into strengths and opportunities. In the case of Isabelle, there was not even an iota of compelling reason for her to be treated like what she encountered. My guess was, probably her boss perceived her as a threat! What do you think?

But as they say, bullying has been a national past time of “egocentric” people these days and that is a sad fact. Next time guys, beware of these people and learn from Isabelle’s experience on how to “wake them up”, when it’s your turn!

Here are 10 traits of psychopaths (sourced from the web) which according to Isabelle his former boss was exactly like them. Surely, his toxic boss is a certified “copy cat”:

1. They tend to exploit and trick others for self-advancement.

2. They have used lies and deception to get their way.

3. They have used ingratiation to get their way.

4. They tend to manipulate others for selfish reasons.

5. They tend not to feel regretful and apologetic after having done wrong.

6. They tend not to worry about whether their behavior is ethical.

7. They tend to be lacking in empathy and crassly unaware of the distress they can cause others.

8. They tend to take a pretty dim view of humanity, attributing nasty motives and selfishness.

9. They tend to be hungry for admiration.

10. They tend to want to be the centre of attention.

Note: Courtesy of Office Politics by Oliver James (Vermillion)

The Iron Lady’s Gone, But Her Legacy Remains!

Who doesn’t know Mrs. Margaret Thatcher , who became the only female Prime Minister of Great Britain (to date), and later became known as the “Iron Lady”, with her aggressive and stern views on both economic policies and political agenda. Certainly, of course, everyone knows “The Lady”, specifically those in politics, governance, academe, business world and even the ordinary people, young and old alike, who have passion in world affairs.

Based on various accounts, it was in the 80’s when Margaret Thatcher was constantly making headlines in dailies and other media networks. I remember my father (whose day, by the way, was not complete if a newspaper was not waiting on the doorstep) was looking at her picture in one of his favorite local dailies with admiration. She was the most powerful woman at that time, which I realized now her decisive stance on various issues, could have paved the way for the re-birth of the so-called “women empowerment” , particularly in politics and the workplace. Note that there are some remarkable women in history, who have also made their own “mark” in their respective fields.

Much as it would be interesting to note about the way Mrs. Thatcher ruled the U.K. Parliament and elaborate on her famous byword : “You turn if you want to. The Lady’s not for turning”, this blog would not dare to touch on these matters, which are somewhat complex and controversial that even her political allies and rivals have misunderstood and vehemently disagreed to some of her policies and programs. Rather, the blog shall mention briefly certain lighter issues regarding among others, the former Prime Minister’s persona and fashion sense and how the said outside forces influence the rising and struggling “power puffs”, so to speak, in the workplace, not only in Britain but throughout the world. Yay! There’s no harm in attempting to talk about this, right?

Earlier in My Useful Tip’s blog posts, the name of Mrs. Thatcher, together with Hillary Clinton, appeared as examples of two women belonging to the top echelons of society who have embraced the so-called “power dressing” (for further information, please search power dressing blog under the fashion category of www.myusefultips.com).

PD (which by the way was coined by My Useful Tips for “power dressing”), as defined on the web, is: a) a style of clothing intended to make the person seem authoritative and competent, especially in professional settings in business, law and government; and b) a stylish and expensive clothing style intended to convey the impression of assertiveness and competence.

With the aforesaid descriptions, Mrs. Thatcher had displayed her dressing style conforming to what PD is all about. Her dressing sense revealed her personal strength, despite her being just a “woman”, and her ability to preside over and deliberate with the members of the Houses of Lords and Commons, the majority of whom are men. For me, that was perhaps a sight to behold! The Honorable Men bowing to the whims of a potent and influential woman!

The photos on the web revealed that she would normally wear tailored pant or skirt suits and a low-heeled court shoes which were appropriate for the people “on-the-go”, that even her suits in pastel colors, still exudes a true feminine power during her time.

As I was browsing her photos on line, I was reminded of my mother who was an authority at home over her children with diverse likes and dislikes. Similarly, Mrs. Thatcher had tried her best to lead the U.K parliament, with a mother instinct, sometimes getting upset when members of the lower and upper chambers were disagreeing with her. Just like a mother in the family, she must have wanted to be the light and guide to his followers, but sadly in the end she was left behind by her staunch supporters after 11 years in power.

As of this time, the present U.K. Parliament is still deliberating on what kind of funeral rites and “honors” should be conferred upon the former lady Prime Minister and what kind of legacy she had left behind!

There is no doubt that the lady Prime Minister who died at 87 years of age, had obviously left a legacy of sorts, mostly in the political spectrum, but definitely she had left a legacy to women who have likewise aspired to “rise up” and have their voices heard in various arena.

To the lady Prime Minister, may your soul rest in peace.

Note: This blog is dedicated to my loving Mom, whose death anniversary is forthcoming!

Love is Real And Love is God!

Love is amazing, it comes in so many forms and in mysterious ways! But sometimes, it is crazy too, right?
God’s love for us is the most wonderful thing that has happened to our lives, the genuineness, sans conditionalities; it is the kind of love that comes from the heart! You know what that means. Have a blessed and meaningful Lenten season to you all!

My Useful Tips would like to share with you this song….down memory lane….LOVE IS REAL! Pleasssssseee like it:-)

A Grain of Rice for the Poor! – Tips and Thoughts

Did you know that there are 925 million(almost a billion) throughout the globe, majority of whom are children in South Asia, particularly China and India? Yes folks, the said data was culled out from the UN’s World Food Program (WFP), a large humanitarian organization whose primary goal is to end world hunger. Cool! (that is how young boys and girls in school would utter if they hear great things).

But of all places worldwide, why China and India? Of course, one may be surprised why on earth there are still millions of hungry people in these countries despite their progress in terms of building major national and agricultural infrastructure. We are likewise cognizant of the fact that these countries are the two powerhouses in information technology, being manufacturers and developers of high-tech hardware and software. Most of all, China is one of the biggest creditors of the United States, a developed and industrialized nation! Yet, there are so many people suffering from hunger and malnutrition in the said countries? Hard-core economists would be able to further elucidate on the subject but there is a simple and logical explanation to this. One could be their dense population and another is the wide disparity between their richest and poorest people, among other things (e.g. beliefs, policies and system of government, etc).

Some people would have thought that most of the suffering and impoverished kids would have come from the poorer countries in Africa, especially when recent harrowing images of dying African kids are being shown on the worldwide web. We can hardly see suffering Chinese children being shown on TV, and in other media and online networks, and even in WFP’s website! Why? This is truly mind-boggling!

According to WFP, there is enough food to feed these people but the access of quality food and the means to deliver the same to the undernourished kids’ table is the big problem. Sure, respective Governments of these affected kids are doing their jobs but definitely it is not sufficient or perhaps it is not a priority.

So, how can each one of us help feed these people? The WFP has designed various ways on how to raise funds and acquire donations from the richer nations and other generous individual donors. But they have also other innovative ways whereby ordinary “unmoneyed” people, either in groups or individuals, can participate and donate grains of rice for the poor worldwide. This is neither a joke nor a scam! It comes from a reputable institution, so it could be real and legit!

My Useful Tips, being an advocate for a good and quality life for everyone, has been attracted to it and decided to join the said WFP’s program which is being managed by the FreeRice team. The scheme is not quite easy as there is a need to invest time and sheer talent (and treasure as well because there is a corresponding value for the time spent) in order to produce a grain of rice. Otherwise, it would be a futile exercise on your part if you don’t have both and the willingness (even on your spare time) to do it!

For more than a month, “My Useful Tips” has already donated more than half a million grains of rice for the hungry in developing countries. Said grains of rice can be gained by answering the questions provided in the website under a wide wide range of categories to select from such as Humanities, English (Grammar and Vocabulary), Mathematics/Algebra, Geography, Science (Anatomy), Chemistry, SAT (Entrance Exams), and other Language Learning (Spanish, French, Italian and German). For every correct answer, there is a corresponding 10 grains of rice which will be remitted to your coffers and eventually donated to the hungry in your name. But it is actually the sponsors and advertisers who pay, in your stead, the corresponding amount for the rice gained/donated.

Half a million grains of rice is not bad at all. It may be “small fry” to some people, but to “My Useful Tips” it’s like catching a “big fish” although it is just starting and learning to walk, a baby step! It has learned to enjoy and love exploring the alleys and byways of freerice web place already, i.e., hopping from one category to another! Hopefully, it would be able to deliver thousands of sacks of rice to the poor when time comes. What is good in this is that responding to the trivia questions does not only allow to share one’s time and donate something for the poor but it also stimulates the mind – a fun way of refreshing what one has learned in school, increasing one’s learning curve and improving his/her/their general knowledge on so many things under the sun! But if you have enough “dough” and don’t have the time, opt to share with them and donate your cash online instead.

Based on My Useful Tips experience, helping solve the world’s greatest problem is worth it!

How about you guys? Why don’t you try, join us, “rice up” and have some fun!

High Global Fashion In 2012 London Olympics

The parade of nations at the opening ceremonies of the 2012 London Olympics on July 27, 2012 revealed a surrealistic painting of the disparity between the delegation of developed and industrial nations and those of the developing and least developed economies.

If you happen to be one of the billions of spectators of the said parade (either via live or digital means), you will agree with me that apart from the gap in the number and magnitude of representations between the two groups of nations, what was more ostensible and visible was the athletes sports uniforms. The developed nations appeared to have showcased their “power sports dressing” sense in Olympic runways. Their athletes were proud to parade in their stylish and natty outfits, as reported, designed by fashion luminaries such as Ralph Lauren, Georgio Armani, Stella McCartney, Prada, among others. Surely, the Governments of each of the said affluent countries must have enough cash to spend not only for their athletes food, shelter, medical care, insurance, etc. but also for their athletes’ trendy sports outfits. How privileged for some of the athletes to be with these groups!

For developing and least developed countries, it is a sad fact that the Governments financial capabilities to provide the needed requirements for their respective athletes may not be adequate or maybe negligible. Budgetary support for sports and athletic commissions, specifically for a trendy outfit, may not be a priority in their economic and political agenda. As such, budget for sports and related activities receives only a small chunk of the overall Government’s budget. Hence, the difference in the Olympic sports wear for these countries, i.e. not as fashionable and stunning (but could be more traditionally nationalistic) compared to that of the rich nations.

Anyway, what is more essential is for the participating nations and their respective athletes to enjoy and relish what Olympics is all about: promote international unity among participating nations, foster camaraderie among athletes, globalization, etc.

But to give you of my faves fashion wear during the parade of nations, here are some of the most stylish and trendy outfits I’ve seen:

United States

See what fashion did to Japan’s Kimono!

A fashion twist in Malaysia’s traditional costume!

Hopefully next time, the Governments of some of the developing countries could spare some cash for their athletes’ uniform. There is nothing wrong in wearing one’s native or traditional dress (sense of nationalism). But for a grand sports events like Olympics and the fact that the same is being held in one of the fashion capitals in the world, it may look awesome for the athletes to wear something decent but stylish, at least to jibe with the rest of the crowd. Just thinking aloud! How about recapping the red, white, blue and yellow hues, Philippines? Probably yellow blazer, blue skirt/pants, etc., oooops!

Boracay Faces Serious Environmental Threat

Decades ago, Boracay used to be a virgin small island (exactly located in the Panay island in Visayas of the Philippines) filled with unexplored natural resources (e.g. beautiful coral reefs, lush greenery, unparalleled white sands, etc.) and untouched by the commercial flair. Only a privileged few backpackers, nature and sea lovers had access to it exclusively relishing its pristine beauty. As a matter of fact not everyone of the island’s natives was aware of its existence; there was no opportunity for them to explore every nook and cranny of the place. No one has thought at that time that the island beach resort could be one of the top tropical beaches in the world or could hit the No.1 spot for the most coveted title of the World’s Best Island Getaway for 2012.

(Note: Photos below are exclusively for www.myusefultips.com’s use!)

As years passed, Boracay was gradually known in other parts of the country making it as one of the favorite places by the locals to spend particularly during summer time. Similarly, foreign investors and local businessmen started inhabiting the place, erecting structures and attracting international and local tourists to flock the place. Commercialization proliferated like a “hot pandesal” (hot roll bread) whereby anyone who has the “dough” can simply “roll down the dough with the pin” , so to speak, and undertake a business in the area, without much exhaustive proper planning, effective implementation and enforcement of zoning and related environmental laws, good management and community involvement.

While the respective owners of these business structures understandably had prior discussions with concerned local officials and eventually were able to obtain the approvals from the local authorities and the needed environmental compliance certificate from the Department of Environment and Natural Resources (DENR), there have been many of these structures to date which have been identified as still not in conformity with the country’s environmental standards, as previously agreed upon.

In view of this, local city and environment officials have been prompted on their duties to enforce existing laws, observe and comply with the guidelines set forth. Various environment concerns were thrown at them by people in media and advocacy groups. As a matter of fact, there is one recent controversial case (the West Cove Hotel) wherein the owner was reprimanded and ordered to strip some parts of the hotel’s already finished structures and developed land area as it exceeded from what has been approved by the environment authorities. For more information on this, please refer to the previous reports/files of the ABS-CBN network. The hotel apparently violated the Forest Land Use Agreement for Tourism Purposes and it was also ordered closed as it operated without building and mayor’s permits. Yup, you’ve heard it right guys! The hotel has been operating for several years without the said requirements? I smell something “fishy”!

The said incident is just one of the large structures built in the area which posed an environmental threat and adverse impact to Boracay’s unique beauty.

But how about other domestic polluters and pollutants in the area? How are they and their wastes being taken cared of? Incidentally, I have seen this bill board posted on one of the palm trees which says: “Let’s Help Keep Our Boracay Island Clean” and with a “No smoking sign”. I thought it was cool as the beach portion of the island is a non-smoking area.

But while strolling along the beach to breath some fresh morning air, I was dismayed to see some trash obviously thrown at a certain place, at the back of the store booths, which seemingly served as a dump site of whoever big shot or any braggart violator/s! Would you believe what I’ve discovered? It was a newly consumed empty pack of “Marlboro” cigarette! What an irony of ironies! There must be some people there who can pretty smoke much freely without being admonished. Shame, shame, shame on them!

And together with the empty pack of cigarette were other waste materials such as empty liquor bottles, plastic glass, candy wrappers and the like.

Moving forward, I was even more horrified to encounter a clear water line flowing down the white beach. I could have given you more or less the exact place, unfortunately, my cam’s battery was dead. I thought it came from a natural brook but as I came closer, it was a canal coming from the commercial establishments with an awful smell attacking us. My companions and I, in fact, had to jump to the other side of the beach road, very much aghast, so as to free our feet from soaking on the infested foul-smelling water. What we have encountered was unthinkable! This is something that should be immediately looked into by local authorities (at least from their level). Calling calling Boracay’s local authorities, specifically the Mayor of Boracay! I hope you and your boys could conduct an unannounced ocular inspection and together with the hotel/stall owners to clean-up the grounds of the beautiful beach. Perhaps, a massive environment related campaign, including sewage treatment, etc. should be conducted with all stakeholders in the area being represented, providing them a lecture and stern warnings particularly on the imminent danger if the same similar negative incidents are left untreated/unresolved.

While private sector/foreign investments in the area is crucial to the island’s economic development (e.g more taxes going into the city’s coffers, employment generation, etc.), it is also equally important for us to be more vigilant in the project monitoring and implementation so as to maintain the beauty of the island. There is nothing wrong with commercialization as long as everything is in order, i.e. there has be seriousness in environment standards compliance and law enforcement.

For Boracay’s visitors, what is essential is what is visible to the naked eye! I, for one, would still love to hear the chirping of the birds and the sounds of sea waves and sea breeze, to see the palm crests over the island, the white sands and the colorful beach waters, the tropical gardens around it and the amazing sunset during chill out time! This is what Boracay should be for all of us and because we treat it as our own, it is but prudent for us to preserve the island’s unique beauty and love the same just like our motherland!

I was actually tempted to scribble these words on the sand for you to know………….how I love the place!

Despite some “interesting” and disappointing glitches during my third day, I would still love to go back to Boracay in the future, if time permits. The place is indeed “toooo” good and “soooo” true and I would like to invite everyone to come and savor the beauty of nature!

This exotic flower from the hotel (I forgot the name, sorry) and the lei made of puka shells given to me made me feel very welcome throughout my entire stay in Boracay!

(The sand design below was constructed by an 8-year old boy. This is for a small amount if visitors wish to take a snap of it. Very artistic!)

Boracay: Where Beach Fashion Enthusiasts Thrive!

We were billeted in a hotel which is ideally located right in the heart of Boracay’s commercial zone. While the shopping center is only a 15-minute walk away, it took us an hour to actually get there as there are lots of small shops and fascinating spots along the way to hop in, selling beach and non-beach apparels, jewelry, coastal crafts and art articles, from authentic to counterfeit items and the so-called Triple A” (a newly coined jargon I’ve learned from one of the salesgirls). I understand that “Triple A’s” are copy cat of branded items, mass-produced but looked exactly the same and made out of a quality raw material. As such, the warning sign of “caveat emptor” or “let the buyer buyer” may have to be observed in some of these interesting places.

For blogging purposes, I got this Ambercombie and Fitch light pink/light blue lounge shorts, made of fine microfiber soft cloth at 5 measly bucks (roughly 200 pesos)! It was bought for several reasons: first, pink color’s cool; second, for necessity; third, it was of good quality; fourth, price was great and fifth, fit was “awesomeness”! Believe it or not, even the A&F tag and the logo appeared intricately embroidered, as if it was a real one, in fairness! I just forgot to bring my newly purchased A&F cardigan and shirt at the Ambercombie&Fitch store in New York, for comparison purposes as far as the label and logo are concerned. Nevertheless, it was a good buy, a value for money thing!

Another beach item which grabbed my interest were various types of beach hats for men and women sold by walking vendors and in small store booths. Unfortunately, I left my cam when I bought this pretty dark pink brim hat with a sash and a ribbon on it. This costs, only $5 bucks (hey, it seemed the $5 bucks was the “d’ figure” for that day, huh!) compared to those being sold inside the mall boutiques at higher prices ranging from $6 to $15.00.

The price mark-up could probably be due to related expenses (e.g. rent, manpower and other utilities). If you happen to see these hats being sold at leading departments stores in fashion capitals in the world (the Harrods in London, Macys in New York or by fashion designers in their respective showrooms), for sure the price tags for the same would be at exorbitant prices. Absolutely, the branded tags on your hat will make it more pricey. The more famous the designer, the higher the tag price!

There are several kinds of bags around the area as well . Beach, tote, shoulder, hobo, sequined, shelled bags and even coin purses too, they have it there. The tote printed bag which I got was a bonanza! It was the last piece in the store and so it was given to me at a special price. Probably that was really intended for me! The cotton cloth is a printed batik in purple color with a full silk lining inside. Its handle is a brown round wooden beads; comfy and easy to hold. I think it would be a great gift for someone or I could keep it for myself or probably make money out of it! Anyone interested?

Another one is this cute red body bag which is made of silk cloth and wood decorated with all kinds of shells, beads and sequins. Really rich in embellishment! These are being sold for $7. Wow! For the price and the quality, you can’t go wrong. Such great value! There are coin purses and trinkets made of woven abaca materials. Cute stuff but nothing extraordinary!

Boracay is for art connoisseurs. Local artists have their own way of showcasing their skills and crafts in painting. It could be on a canvass, or simply in a new shirt, or would you believe even on key chains.

You can have it personalized, with designs to your specifications. This shirt below is a simple one, but the “sun” was embossed for stunning clarity. Did you notice that? Love it!

Beach sandals, sneakers, flip-flops, and slippers abound in the area. Notable ones were those made in Brazil: Havaianas and Ipanema. However, the locally made footwear brand “Sandugo” was almost everywhere and I thought this brand could go a long way!

Oh, if you’re a fan of swim and beach wears, I have seen crazy-cute ones but the rest were just too sexy and daring for my taste. They have a run down of the latest and the trendiest styles that you can wear. I am not really a swim wear buff, so I didn’t get one. Fine for my tapering wallet!

While the day was mostly spent for walking and walking and window shopping, it was worth doing. My legs and feet didn’t feel tired because I enjoyed the variety the place could offer, the fresh air, and the little things I acquired during the day! Just like any other fashion enthusiasts, I happen to love to window shop! The Boracay mall and the stalls along the shore is now one of my favorite places to find unique and one of a kind vintage treasures. And I think it would be yours too!

My next blog about Boracay would be quite intriguing. Keep coming back guys!

Boracay:The ParadiseTo Beat! – My Second Day

I woke up the next day looking forward to having a glimpse of the beach at daytime as it was getting dark and raining when we reached the island the other day. Note that in tropical islands like those in the Philippines, weather can be erratic and unpredictable, and so I was skeptical of the events that would be in store for the Boracay visitors at this time of year. When I rushed out of the hotel room, I was glad to see the morning sun smiling; its beaming rays extended to the hotel’s veranda made me smile too! I thought it would be a great time to plunge into the beach waters knowing that it could be hot and humid all day!

The hot native “tsokolate eh” or the “chocolate e” (heavy hot chocolate) served during the buffet breakfast literally perked up my day! It tasted like real chocolate (lol)!

(Note: Photos below are for exclusive use of www.myusefultips.com only. Hence, no reproduction is allowed!)

After having the complimentary buffet breakfast (yum, yum, yum !), we proceeded directly to the beach which was only a few steps away from the hotel’s dining area.

It was truly relaxing and refreshing to see the beach so close and feel the warmth of the sand and water. I had to remove my Brazil-made havaianas slippers so I could soak my bare feet into the wet white sand along the shore. The sand’s powder white/soiled white were soothing and the beach was astonishing! It was very colorful, the sea water looked like a rainbow from afar but only thing, it had no shades of red and orange colors. However, the yellow, green, blue, violet and indigo shades were evident. The light greens and yellows could be seen in the shallow waters, while as I looked from afar to the depths of the sea, the light blue, light violet, indigo and dark blue hues were somewhat manifested; as the sea waves moved, the colors changed. Was I hallucinating? I don’t think so. You have to experience it to believe me!

Along the sides of the beach were coconut trees which to me served a number of useful purposes: e.g. beautification, protection from the angry sea waves as the sturdy trunks of the trees block the latter when it ferociously crash the beach, and most of all it also could serve as a romantic spot for lovers and honeymooners to spend under the shady tree! Hmmm, day dreaming!

Perhaps, I am one of those from tropical countries surrounded by oceans and seas who is still reluctant to swim. Seriously, I merely immersed myself into the shallow waters, bending my knees and treading the waters by moving my arms, really couldn’t swim, not even a dog paddle. Poor me! Know why? I acquired this semi-phobia of seas and oceans, I almost drowned during my childhood. But I overcame such fear factor and that’s why I still look forward going to beaches and pools.

While we were excited to embark on our swimming escapade, it started to rain. You see when it rains and is accompanied by winds, small sea waves are being formed. And that’s what really happened. It was my first time to experience being in the sea waters while raining. It was fun to play with the small waves, it was very very nice! The feeling was sort of being in a spa taking a shower with a gentle massage. The ripples of small waves was practically doing a soft rub down on my back! What a luxurious nature bath!

And so, after savoring the coolness and gentleness of the sea waters, we decided to have a walk and look for a hearty meal. We were thinking for a fresh sea food galore, which Boracay island is also known for. There are a lot of dining areas, bars and restaurants which would cook for you a variety of sea foods (e.g. crabs, lobsters, prawns, all kinds of fish, scallops, sea shells for soup, etc.) according to your preference.

However, if you are a food connoisseur and prefers to cook food by yourself, you can simply go to the public wet market and buy them directly from the fishermen or the fish vendors. There is also a Budget Mart where you can get mineral/springs/purified waters, all kinds of drinks (local and imported), personal needs and a lot more. There’s practically no problem as far as food and drinks are concerned.

Subsequently, we toured around and found all kinds of people walking and frolicking in the beach. There were families spending quality time together, football buddies, camera conscious and photo buffs and would you believe, even newly graduates with their graduation togas and caps on, had much enjoyment in the island.

Various commercial establishments already abound in the area. The shopping outlets are almost everywhere, from branded stuffs to native local wears and accessories. I have a useful tip to share with you guys. For a certain similar product for instance, you may try looking at the things being sold by local small entrepreneurs. They have these makeshift store stalls or booths located along or a few steps to the seashore where certain souvenir items, handicrafts and latest trends can be acquired at a much lower price ( with your bargaining prowess of course!) vis-a-vis those located inside the “d’ mall”, Boracay’s commercial district.

Boracay is also famous for tattooing activities, especially for the teens and tweens and enthusiasts. You can have a henna tattoo for only a P100.00 to P400.00 ($2.50 to $10.00) which could last for weeks or a month, depending on how you handle it. However, if you are prone to or you have history of allergic reactions, just don’t dare to have your most sought design or letters printed on your skin, it might not be advisable. There are cases where temporary hennas can cause skin allergies. Hair braiding is likewise a trend in this island resort, both for men and women.

At night, some hotels offer a fine dining with full bar and with a lounge to relax on. It is usually being set up in a makeshift tent near the sea shore. In the hotel where I stayed, a seafood dinner buffet was offered for only $14.00 per head and an additional $11.00 if you decide to have unlimited cocktails just along the beach side. Said dinner buffet can be enjoyed with an amazing music performed by local music band group wonderfully singing all music genres.

While the band was taking a break, the diners would then be entertained by fire dancers. Fire dancing is one of the many great features Boracay is known for during night time. In our case, what we saw were young boys (yes, they were boys, clothed in a girl’s wardrobe, they were actually legitimate gays!). They were probably in their late teens or early tweens and I should say experts in fire dancing, doing some acrobatic acts, creating unique backward and alternating moves, graciously dancing to the tune of pop and sometimes bohemian/middle eastern music. They went around the diners’ tables and made them feel of the heat of what they’re holding on (ooops I was not sure of the thing but I know there was kerosene poured on it). Amazing, thrilling but could be dangerous too! Even the passersby/onlookers were enticed to stop by (outside the tent) and watched the daring fire dancers, for free!

Whew, the second day was a hectic fun one! I thought the third day would plainly be strolling around the white long beach and do some window shopping mostly in the booths of the small local entrepreneurs. Oh, Boracay is definitely the place to be…. to beat! See ya in my next blog!